3/5/16
Jackson had his 3rd Zoledronate IV treatment today and boy is he speaking to me loud and clear. In my last post I was having one of those periods in time when things looked bleak and life was uncertain and it was hard to keep the faith. As I stated I had been talking to Jackson to show me he’s ok and by God he’s telling me everyday that he’s just fine. The week leading up to today he slowly began to turn a corner, seeming to get stronger walking at times on his bad right front leg more and having lots more energy. He’s been wanting to sit out in the yard morning, noon and night if he could, taking all the sights and sounds in and back to his old antics of not wanting to come inside. He loves chewing his sticks and doing one of what I call the “Happy Dog Dance”, rolling on his back, all 3 legs flailing overhead. He’s been showing me everyday “Maw we can do this, I’m doing this and don’t give up on me” or this process. So we plunge forward taking all these days as little miracles from heaven and living…really living…rather than being stuck in the dreadful fear of the unknown and the thought of dying.
Today, I can sense Jackson is apprehensive like he always is as we wait in the room for the technician to come in with Dr. S. to check him out. We brought Steve with us who always has a calming presence for all, he’s my “Rock” and today I think Jackson feels the same. He sat behind him with his leg across his chest supporting him, yet also making sure Jackson didn’t move when they were putting the IV in or during treatment. We spoke with Dr. S about our apprehension with him losing muscle mass in his right front leg and not knowing if the treatments are working. We could always take another x-ray to see if there’s bone growth in the bad leg, but we both decide that this isn’t the best for Jackson as his previous x-rays have really caused a lot of stress on him and pain setting him back days. Dr. S. proceeds to tell us that we will gain a sense of how he’s doing from his actions on a daily basis. So we decide that since there continues to be no negative side effects to the Zoledronate we’ll keep moving forward.
Since the last visit they’ve allowed me to stay in the room with him while they put the IV in and administer the medication as this isn’t chemo and not harmful to me. The tech attempts to put the IV in his bad leg (wanting to switch each treatment from leg to leg), but not today it’s the 2nd time I’ve seen Jackson act aggressive because of the pain. He swung his head around so quickly with teeth barred at her ready to lunge forward, so nope that wouldn’t be the leg she would use today. The other leg was much easier and she made a note in his chart to always use the good leg from now on. The IV takes about 15 min. so we settle Jackson in on the comforter on the floor and Steve hold onto him with his leg. This gesture alone I think calms Jackson because instead of his usually panting and restlessness he seems a little more settled and the tech notices as well. I think I’ll be bringing Steve more often to our appointments as I’m sure Jackson is picking up on my anxiety for sure.
The rest of the day is uneventful and we head home bathing Jackson in treats, kisses, hugs and lots of loving. When we get home he goes right for his sticks and settles on top the hill enjoying the rest of the day in the sun! These are the dog days for sure and we are living them to the fullest!
